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I have been struggling in my confessions. I am not comfortable with my father of confession because he is not helping me at all. I want to grow in my spiritual life but I can't do that if I don't have guidance. I read a lot of spiritual books and increased my Bible readings. My dilemma is that in the books I am reading, the church fathers say in them that my father of confession should be following up with me. I feel like I go to a doctor and he tells me what is wrong with me although I know what it is and I feel the pain but he is not giving me medicine. I have to grab what is on the shelf and I am afraid that it might be harmful. I don't know what the best thing to do is; should I just go confess my sins for the sake of cleansing and just figure out the spiritual advice I need from books on my own? I can't change into any other priest in that area because I think I am going to have the same issue; they are either too busy, or they won't care because I don't go to their church. Some of my friends suggested that I talk to someone I feel comfortable with out of state. I tried that in the convention and I loved the priest I sat with and he gave me good advice, but that will mean I will confess on a yearly bases? Will he remember me? Will he be able to follow up with me? I am not sure; please help me because this is really bothering me.

Your relationship with one endeared confession father is very important and much needed. The better he knows you, the better he can prescribe what you need in order for you to grow spiritually. That is why he should know everything about you as a person and not only through the sins which you confess. He should know your strengths and weaknesses, the good and the bad. You must also be willing to share everything with him and freely trust him completely, even in times when you do not necessarily agree. If you are comfortable with the priest you met at the convention, there is no reason why he cannot be your confession father, if he agrees. You must be committed to this relationship and be diligent to contact him as you both agree. Your confessions can be made by phone, so there is no need to wait for a year when you see him. If your parents or siblings live in a different state or country, would you be content to connect with them only when you see them? Can you forget about them or they forget about you because they do not see you often? The answer is of course not. That is why when you develop a father/daughter relationship with a confession father with whom you can easily relate, it should be a solid relationship regardless of distance. Be determined to live a life of repentance and remain in frequent contact with him.