Q&A Home > S > Sex / Sexuality > Sex in Marriage

What is the correct spiritual, biblical, Orthodox and ecclesiastical concept of sexual relations in marriage? How should a prospective spouse view this concept?

The Holy Bible regards sex in marriage as a good gift from God (1 Cor 7:7). The Holy Bible says, "God created man in his own image; in the image of God he created man; male and female he created them. Then God blessed them and said to them, Be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth and subdue it" (Gen 1:27-28), "Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good" (Gen 1:31). So the male-female distinction, the reproductive process, and the pleasures associated with it, is part of the good world created by the Almighty God.

St. Paul commands that husbands and wives to not deprive one another unless they both agree for a period of prayer and fasting. But then he tells them to come together again so they can avoid temptation (1 Cor 7:5).

So the Holy Bible clearly teaches that physical love between husband and wife is a good thing. Sex is the physical expression of the union between husband and wife. Scripture says, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Gen 2:24). Our Lord Jesus Christ said, "They are no longer two, but one flesh," and "what God has joined together, let no man put apart" (Mt 19:6).

The Holy Spirit sanctifies the marriage bond so that it becomes a spiritual bond. That is why St. Paul says: "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled" (Heb 13:4). It is the Holy Spirit Who blesses and sanctifies this bond. Therefore, what God has joined let no man separate.

However, in everything we do there must be moderation, "All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any" (1 Cor 6:12).

There are a few points to be considered: all the fast days including Wednesdays and Fridays, as well as Sundays and any day on which Liturgy is celebrated and communion received, is to be started with abstinence and dedicated for worship and praise.

A husband and wife have to come into an agreement regarding this matter as St. Paul says, "The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control" (1 Cor 7:4-5).