Q&A Home > P > Premarital Disclosure

• How does God perceive virginity and the first sexual encounter shared between a newlywed couple after the sacrament of marriage?
• How heavily should a female weigh a male's past mistakes while considering whether to pursue a relationship with him?
• I am of age to get married. I recently met a girl with whom I started talking. All of our interests are lining up and we are mostly on the same page. The only thing is that she just told me that in her past relationship, she lost her virginity and she regrets it so much and considers that it was a huge mistake. I understand people make mistakes, but I am not sure how to handle this situation. This is my first time where I encountered this problem. I am not in a position to judge her and at the same time I am trying to put it behind me. I do not feel that one bad decision in life can make you less of a person. So my question is has this scenario happened before and if so, did it cause problems after marriage or not?
• I was wondering if any details of past relationships that are not a part of one's life anymore must be disclosed to a girl?one is interested in before engagement or marriage? How much detail must be disclosed if it is necessary and why? I confessed to my father of confession one year ago about something. He told me I would have to tell the girl I'm going to marry this information. It troubled me because I could see it affecting my relationship with a girl whom I truly love. I am not in any relationships now but this is something that is bothering me. I do not mean to second guess my father of confession but I can not think of a reason to tell the girl, if by the grace of God the sin is in the past and not a current struggle.
• If I sent a man nude pictures before marriage but repented and confessed, would I have to admit to telling him before we get married? 
• If the male wants to do whatever is objectively best for the female regardless of the impact it has on him, should the male in this scenario not pursue a relationship with the female altogether in order to avoid the heartache she may undergo while struggling with his past?
• If two spiritually, mentally, and emotionally mature young adults are getting to know each other with the intent for marriage, how heavily should each weigh the other's past relationships while deciding whether to move toward a committed relationship. In particular, If the male had impure relationships in the past and has since then undergone penance and repented under the guidance of his spiritual father. Later he disclosed these past mistakes to a female WITH he is interested in pursuing a relationship in hopes of maintaining transparency between them and a spirit of mutual trust and honesty. The female respects his decision to be honest with her but she has maintained her physical virginity (as well as spiritual) and purposely abstained from physical relations during her college years in hopes of saving her first sexual experience for her future husband. Although the male may attained forgiveness, restoration, a pure heart, and a renewed mind (Romans 12:2), his past mistakes create a hurdle for his future wife because she has to come to grips with his prior shortcomings. There may be a sense of grief on the part of the female because the male is unable to reciprocate a shared initial sexual experience that she rightfully values and has made a conscious effort to preserve and offer for her husband.