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I am 15 years old and I need your guidance. I started smoking. I stopped praying. I curse often. I do so much stuff that I never ever thought that I would do. I wish to go back to God like I was before. I want to stop all these sins and resume my former spiritual life.

You have already taken the first brave and correct step towards perfection by acknowledging and identifying your mistakes. You have also taken another brave and positive step, which is desiring to live the type of life that God wants you to lead. You did not escape nor hide from Him. That is exactly what repentance is all about.

Adolescence is a stepping-stone to adulthood. Successful passage through  adolescence ensures  a fruitful adulthood. Many of the feelings you are experiencing and  acknowledge entertaining are manifestations of normal development. You should acknowledge them as such; just do not entertain them.

The thoughts and actions you have mentioned are similar to any other spiritual trouble or temptation.. No one can escape from trouble nor  can grow without struggle in life. Look realistically at your problems.

When we acknowledge our weaknesses,  we are given abundant grace. Through this grace we are given the courage, faith and strength to put aside undesirable behaviors. By not allowing ourselves to be defeated, we gain victory over our earthly weaknesses.

Our main source of help is God himself. We need to draw closer to Him. Attend the Divine Liturgy early, go to church before others arrive, and pray to the Lord. Pray early in the morning and late at night in a very quiet place. Read your Holy Bible and meditate on the readings. Ask God for strength to mature and leave these behaviors behind. Learn this verse by heart, and let it become your motto:

"We work hard with our own hands. When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure it; when we are slandered, we answer kindly" (I Corinthians 4:12-13).

Also choose your friends very wisely. I want you to read the article, The Other Wing" found in the Mighty Arrows, vol. 1 no.3, April 2001. It describes searching and finding the true friends in our life.

I would like to also recommend reading and reciting the 23rd Holy Psalm. Everyone should really learn this Holy Psalm by heart. When you say it out loud, God hears you and He lets you know inside your heart that He is being strong for you when you can't be strong for yourself.

"The LORD is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell[a] in the house of the LORD Forever."