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I sinned very much when I was 18 till a few months ago. When I turned twenty, I realized the consequences of my sins and have stopped. But the only reason I stopped was because of fear of the law. I pray now and everything but I am very troubled psychologically. I keep getting these thoughts that something very bad is going to happen, and I even think of suicide I used to be a deacon, but I stopped because I feel so embarrassed. I have confessed in general (I did not mention the action I did, but the sin itself) and I stopped doing all this wrong. But these thoughts still trouble me greatly. I thought of seeing a psychologist, because I get these mood swings. One day I'm happy, and the other I'm very depressed.

The life of repentance is an ongoing process and an intimate relationship with God the Creator, God the Redeemer, and God the Comforter. "I have sinned" are truly the sweetest words and the direct line to God's immediate attention. The struggle you are experiencing appears to be between rationalizing and accepting your actions. Allow your confessions to be complete. Exposing all of one's sins and foolishness exposes the devil himself. Do not spare any lodging for the evil one to trouble you. Take responsibility for your actions with the guidance of the priest. Explain to him that there are more details that you would like to share with him, but you are struggling with revealing them. It is the Holy Spirit, the Comforter, Who is listening to your candid confession, advocating for you; and will instruct the priest in proposing steps to redirect you back on the path of repentance, and a life of a continuous one. Study Psalm 77, and reflect on God's many tender mercies and redemptive works in your life. God has not forgotten to be gracious.

Your mood swings may or may not be directly related to this particular sin. For example, you may have had mood swings in your earlier youth days, but now that you are a man, can identify what this is. Could these mood swings or other psychological explanations have contributed to the "sins" you engaged in nearly 2 years ago? What about these occasional suicidal thinking? Psychological or psychiatric evaluation can be helpful especially if contributing factors may be alleviated through monitored medication and/or short-term psychotherapy. Because of the variant approaches to psychology, it is strongly advised that your priest remains involved in your progress.  

Attend church on a regular basis. Tasbeha, means praise, and does not have qualifying criteria of the righteousness of the person praising. The most repeated verse in any of our services is "Lord Have Mercy" {Yes, Lord have mercy on me, a sinner}.